Confidence Tips from Carrie Bradshaw

One of my favorite episodes of the Sex and the City series follows Carrie Bradshaw as she overcomes her fear of eating alone at restaurants in New York City. Carrie, a confident, independent journalist, doesn’t understand why she is too self-conscious to eat at a table by herself in front of other people.

She gets nervous about what other people will think of her or how they will judge her, so she always has an excuse. She brings a book. She says she is waiting on someone and has two places set at the table. She talks on her cell phone as if she is having a business lunch. All of this, though, is a mask for her real insecurities.

I think the reason I love this episode so much is because I am the exact same way. Instead of enjoying the moment and the peace to myself, I spend the whole time analyzing what people might think about me being there. Heaven forbid these strangers think I’m weird…or worse yet- unpopular!

Needless to say, by the end of the show, Carrie has learned to be comfortable enough in her own skin to go to lunch – on her own- with no book, or cell phone, or extra place setting. She is so proud of herself and enjoyed her time so much that she says in her closing speech that she actually wants to eat alone more often. (Although I don’t know if I really believe her.)

I don’t think I could ever get to the point of wanting to eat by myself, but I did try to eat alone this week when I had an hour to kill between two appointments. It wasn’t easy not to reach for that Shape magazine that was burning a hole through my bag or call my mom on my Blackberry that was sitting conveniently next to my drink…but I officially made it through – and lived to tell about it!

To be honest with you, I would not call the experience a fun one, but I did learn a lot about myself, especially the things I worried about the most. By the end of the house, I was laughing at how worked up I was getting over people’s perceptions of me. Who cares what these people think? It’s not like I’m ever going to see them again!

I challenge anyone who reads this to try it for themselves; you’ll learn a lot about your own insecurities. Or you might just like it! My friend Taylor said it was the most relaxing part of her week when she ate alone at the Farm at L.A. Live. Instead of worrying about people watching her, she spent her break watching everyone else!

Take some advice from Carrie Bradshaw and me (and my friend Taylor) and get out there! Go get comfortable in your own skin and tell someone about it. Happy eating!